Soul Search

I do this, a lot. I'm pretty exhausted from it actually.

Situation update: I have my undergraduate degree in economics and political science, which is cool. But it was never what i really wanted to do. I guess I never wanted to cheat my mom out of 80K for an impractical liberal arts degree. I can now balance budgets and predict forecasts to a T. That does not enrich me whatsoever, and that's ok.

Now I'm hoping to finance my own education. The education I wanted for myself, by myself. It's exciting actually, the prospect of studying in classes I'm paying for with my full time salary. And yes I'll be exhausted. And yes I will probably cry myself to sleep a lot. But I'm determined as hell

Went to The Getty this weekend. Finally saw the monet's there! Incredible. Renoir's La Promenade! Exquisite. The Degas' and Manet's didn't impress me much. I'm glad my cousin's interested in the arts too, it'd get pretty lonesome wandering exhibits completely alone.

This is Monet's The Portal of Rouen Cathedral in Morning Light. Gorgeous in person, bland in 2d print. It's all about the texture and optical illusion. His process was cool too - this is one of 30 prints done to study the effects of light on this one particular building. He didn't finish any of them until 2 years after he started. I've decided i'm not the biggest fan on impressionism, but monet has a talent I can't comprehend. He saw how the light dances and captured it exquisitely.

This seems true

The Frugal Repast - 1904

This is Picasso. Seriously. Apparently he is considered the greatest printmaker of the twentieth century in addition to being an incredible sculptor, painter, father of cubism etc. He etched this at a tender age of 23, living in bohemian Montmartre (very possibly close the the cafe where we had duck confit and escargot). I really like how uninterested they are..how masculine the girl looks..and how subtle everything is.

Anywho, life is good. As I try to involve myself in the arts I'm learning that the study of art isn't as much about the creativity as it is about the anthropology. Where I look at a Giotto and see well shaded people, a curator will look at it and discover the historic location, time, and radicalism of the piece. The curator sees a movement, an entire culture and the artist's relationship with said culture. Its really quite bomb.

OK..I need to stop having 24 hour days and sleep when my body needs to. This is enriching but TRULY desctructive

Isaac Brock is strange and wonderful

I love this EP..its progressive and chipper. Yay for musical evolution. Its been out for a while but I finally got time to download (my most favorite sunday activity).

I've always been fascinated with brock's vocals, but their other music in long spurts brings me down. This stuff is fun. And still complex enough to keep my attention

Religious, I am not

But I spent an hour in front of El Greco's painting at the SDMA. Obviously the single piece pales in comparison to the Prado's vast collection, but his work is so expressive. I tried to go through the spanish painters chronologically but was instantly drawn to his Penitent St. Peter


















The Penitent St. Peter @ SDMA
The Adoration of the Shepherds @ the Prado

Selfless, Cold, and Composed

I've always used these sorta things in a constructive way. As a driving force to change my life for the positive

I'm way bent on ambition. Some of my friends find it impressive. It's sort of just a constructive way to channel frustration, anger, w/e

I am feeling things that I haven't felt in a while. And that is why I need to be cold. I can't care about things anymore, except myself my abilities my interests. Creativity, change, productivity, movement

Always movement and newness. Freshness feels real

Anyway, Europe was wonderful. America on the other hand...Idelle put it best - AMERICAN REALITY CHECK