zip zilch nada focus

I think what happens... When you have a conversation with someone you haven't talked to in forever, and it "feels like they know you" better than anyone presently in your life, that it means something. Ask me this a year ago I'd conjure up some pathetic prince charming parody. I'm pretty sure now that it means you're static, immobile, and just not changing. It's a kick in the face to grow up, basically

that said. I'm cracked out on 2 redbulls, can't begin to start studying for my railroads class because, well, it's a class about railroads, and wanting desperately to play some online game till that moment of desperation. viva la textwist!

noted: I'm starting to get really entrenched in homosexual/queer politics classes. This being my third class that's pretty deeply involved in sexuality and rights, I find myself really gravitating towards this aspect of society. I just find it so interesting because of the similarities to civil rights, 2nd wave feminism, etc, and the blindness of our society to perceive this. And I guess my own personal brainwash up till this point. Many a times last quarter I'd find myself in inebriated debates about sexuality with community college dropouts. I do fear sounding ignorant in intellectual settings, especially because I know first hand the tone that intellectuals take when dealing with the less learned.

The most interesting thing to date has been the analogy to religion that we were studying two weeks ago. I'll delve later, because it's really understandable and I don't want to forget this thought, but I want to comment on the accessibility of the analogy itself. My utter admiration is for people who don't alienate themselves with purely intellectual rhetoric, but try to translate academia into daily discourse. To bring things we study into public limelight is kind of essential when dealing with this stuff, because so much of it is based on consciousness. No consciousness can be gained when incomprehensible to those who are not in the same position.

I think open mindedness and understanding is everything. That's why writing is important to me, it's what brings people into common perception. It's a way to translate abstract ideas that go on in everyone's head, into something shared and real. And sometimes the medium of spoken communication is fake, it's a compromise of what you believe others will perceive as okay, and not the thought in purity. ok i need to really study damnit